The Lost Art of Communication

E-mail, texting, blogs, facebook – are all relatively new, faster, and easier ways to communicate. However, are they better? Joseph Priestly said many, many years ago, “The more elaborate our means of communication, the less we communicate.”

I remember a few years ago one of the commercials on TV said “Reach out and touch someone.” They were talking about communication. Have you “reached out and touched someone” lately? I’m not talking about e-mail, texting, blogs or facebook.

All of my older kids have cell phones. I was thinking that it would be easier to keep in contact with them now. In some ways it is, but in other ways our communication has lost its personal touch. Most times I can call, and call, and call and receive no answer. However, if I text – more often then not they will text back. It’s a short communication and a very impersonal way of communicating. Yet it seems to be the way that our one on one communication will be in the future. Some kids with cell phones have 6000, 8000, or even more than 10,000 texts a month. Where is the “reaching out and touching someone” in this type of communication? Kristi attends a school for advanced and gifted students – students who are dedicated to their learning. One of her classmates got her first cell phone. She was texting so much, including school hours that hergrades went from A’s to failing. Her dedication to learning stopped when she got her phone. Her phone was gone when her parents saw her grades and texting bill! I would get texts from my kids during class time, which didn't make me happy. Doug has teased Mikel that she will be asked through texting for her hand in marriage – and she will text back her answer. Extreme – maybe, but with the impersonal form of communication today it doesn’t sound so far-fetched.

I came across another quote, this one by Anthony Robbins. He said “The way we communicate with others and with ourselves ultimately determines the quality of our lives.” I would like to add to the end of that “the quality of our lives” with our family and friends. Getting a text, reading a blog, seeing it on facebook, does not get the same personal touch as a phone call or a visit. By reading something you can’t hear the excitement, disappoint, fear, or any other emotion in their voice as you can by actually talking to them. And in return, they can’t hear the emotional response back if it is only read. Yes, you can have those exclamation points on the blog or facebook, but it isn’t the same. There is a reason the church has guidelines in place for visiting teaching, in making sure you have a personal visit once every three months. Sending a card or calling all the time cannot give you that bond you need to have with those whom you teach. You can’t develop a personal relationship if you just send a card or letter all the time. It is the same with your relationship with the Lord. You can’t have one if you aren’t talking to him. Just like with family and friends. You can’t have that personal relationship if you are only doing the impersonal ways of communication. It has to go both ways too – each of the parties reaching out and taking the time to talk or have a visit. Not every day or every week, but on a regular basis. Reach out when you have that news, good or bad. Most people have cell phones which make long distance calling affordable – and you can call from most anywhere. When we moved to Mesa, we only had the regular long distance yet Doug and I made it a priority to call our parents as much as possible, as our money would allow. Reaching out – making the personal touch means a lot. It keeps families and friendships together. It bonds you together. It helps determine the quality of our lives as families and friends. Go ahead – reach out and touch someone today. I will be.